Build from the Ground Up

Have you ever looked at someone and wished you could be as confident, self-assured, and as likable as them? If not, then do you admire how patient, calm, and empathetic someone can be? What I asked may not resonate with you, but you may know someone who is this way.

Each person I've ever met has admired someone because of characteristics s/he finds appealing or attractive. Typically, the people I've met have desired certain characteristics in a person because s/he views them as a measure of success. "If I am fearless in any situation, I will be unstoppable." "If I more fun, I would be liked more." Do these statements sound familiar? If so, I can relate. I have thought about these types of statements for years. In fact, I thought about them so much that they consumed my life.

For a long time, I was envious of those who "had it all". I could spend all day looking at their lavish lifestyles, how they were perfectly manicured, and how they received high praise from others. Over time, I have learned to not focus on the artificial aspects of their lives. Instead, I learned to focus on who successful people are and what makes them successful. I have learned that successful people are successful because of key characteristics. I admire Donald Trump's ability to be decisive, Oprah's ability to show compassion, and Jeff Dunham's ability to make people laugh, while using his gift of ventriloquism. As I study the characteristics I like in each person, then I look at myself and brainstorm how I can use their characteristics to leverage success in my own life.

Since I have done this, I have made great strides. I think the greatest stride I've made thus far is to stop making excuses. Growing up, I blamed many external circumstances for my lack of success. I blamed politics, childhood, socioeconomic status, and much more for my lack of success. Guess what? It always ended badly. One day, I had to stop making excuses for my actions, own up to them, and make success happen instead of letting someone take my opportunities and options away from me. How has this happened? It is because I observed this in every successful person I've ever seen or met, regardless of status in society.

What I am telling you is that you are responsible for your successes in life. Bad things can happen to anyone; what matters is how you act in each situation. If you emulate those who are successful, you will be better for the experience. You may become impatient initially, but some of the greatest things in life have to be built from the ground up. It's time to build your foundation for success.