Are You Having an Identity Crisis?

Do you know who you are? Could you effectively describe yourself to someone you've never met? When you talk about yourself, do you talk about the same few things or do you talk about a variety of topics? If you know exactly who you are and can communicate you effectively, I give you all the props in the world.

Many people I know cannot describe who they are; I used to be this way. I started school when I was 2 years old and went straight through till I was 26 years old. Okay, okay. I took a semester off to work in Admissions for a local college. Then, I went back to graduate school. Throughout my school years, I earned countless awards and received positive recognition for my accomplishments. At the ripe age of 26, I earned my Master's degree. What do I do now?!?

I spent countless hours creating cover letters and resumes, but had no luck. A month later, I joined a networking group to help me become an ideal candidate for a job. At my first meeting, I introduced myself, but my introduction was different. Everyone else communicated their name, the industry they were from, and the job they wanted. I could do the first 2, but the last one stumped me. I improvised and made everyone in the room laugh. Although I was successful at creating a first impression, why was I there? Who was I? What did I represent? Why was I there?

It was scary to realize I had no career plan. My entire identity was tied to education: research; professional experience; volunteer opportunities; and service experience. My portfolio was impressive....but not to industry professionals. I felt defeated and worthless. I spent the next few months taking personality, job, and industry assessments. Regardless of the number of hours I put into the assessments, along with networking, attending meetings, going on interviews, and polishing my cover letters and resumes, I still didn't know what I was after.

One day, someone asked me: "If you could do one job that would make you happy and you had to do it for free, what would it be?" At that moment, I knew the answer was right in front of my face the entire time; I wanted to be a Professor of Communication. For so long, I thought I was wasting my time. To my surprise, I needed to go through the self-awareness journey to figure out what I really wanted.

Going through the self-awareness journey taught me that I cannot place so much of my identity on one thing. When that thing (education) went away, I felt like my identity was gone forever. However, my identity was never gone; I needed to discover it. Yes, I did stay in education, but I no longer use it as my sole source of identity. I have hobbies, unique experiences, and things that make me unique. If you're going through an identity crisis, ask yourself why that may be the case. If you're trying to figure out who you are, take a detour. Go to places you've never been, talk to people you don't know, and make yourself vulnerable. By doing this, you will find who you are.